Friday, August 2, 2013

Life Happens

I don't have a bucket list. I've never been the five-year plan type. I don't like to make lists. Whenever I put something down on paper, it means I have to do it. I don't like anyone telling me what to do, even if it's me. It's a wonder I get anything done.

Really, much of my life has been guided by the John Lennon truism, "Life is what happens while you are busy making other plans". When I'm 80 and sitting on a rocking chair, I think I will remember the things that kind of just happened to me.

I didn't plan on marrying my husband six months after I met him. I didn't plan on waiting to have my daughter until I was 44. I believe that these things happened by the grace of God.

Bucket lists always include travel. My most memorable trip was a complete fluke. An acquaintance told me she was going to Ecuador for her cousin's wedding. I said, "Wow, I'd love to go to Ecuador." She said, "Wanna come?" So I went.

The day of the wedding, a gaggle of family matriarchs were eyeing me up and down, and talking in Spanish.

Two minutes later, I was a bridesmaid.

Someone explained to me in English that one of the bridesmaids forgot to show up. I was rather unceremoniously packed into a maroon bridesmaid's dress that was two sizes too small, while another more anticipated bridesmaid was having her dress hemmed with duct tape.The Roman Catholic priest conducted the service entirely in Spanish, a language of which my knowledge is sketchy. Everyone stood up, sat down, stood up again. I remained a beat behind, with no clue what was going on. The reception hall was sandwiched between a circus on one side and an auto body shop on the other.

I wish I could share some of the pictures from the wedding with you, but they are all packed away somewhere. Most of them show me laughing hysterically at how surreal the experience was.

I could go on. Ecuador blew my mind. The people took non-planning to a level that made me uncomfortable. I marveled at their genius ability to roll with life, and have fun no matter what the circumstance. The trip was a once in a lifetime experience that I will never forget. The country of Ecuador is beautiful, it's people welcoming, it's food divine.

So in honor of my husband, my child and a trip to Ecuador, my bucket list includes:

1) Seeing where life takes me.

2) Striving to teach my daughter, Claire, to appreciate where life takes her.

3) Inviting anyone else who would like to join in to come along for the ride.

There's an unofficial #4 to add to this bucket list: I am finally linking up with Finish the Sentence Friday, something I have been wanting to do for awhile. I am so happy that I've been able to get over writer's block and write off the prompt "My Bucket List Includes" (even though I kinda wrote a non-Bucket List). Big thanks to one of the FTSF hostesses, Stephanie, for encouraging me to contribute a post.

And in the spirit of things not always working the way you planned, I cannot figure how to paste the FTSF button. So...if you would like to join the Finish the Sentence Friday Party, allow me to introduce you to your lovely hostesses:

Stephanie, Mommy for Real

Janine, Confessions of a Mommyaholic

Kate, Can I GetAnother Bottle of Whine

Dawn, Dawn's Disaster


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Photo Source: Garrett-btm, Deviant Art


55 comments:

  1. Rachel, you made my night seeing that you joined us and so glad Stephanie got you to linkup!! But seriously loved your list, especially what you want to teach Claire. Trust me I am with you on not being much of a list maker in my daily life. Sharing what I would like to do in the future was more me going through things I wanted and things I possibly would like, but in the grand scheme of things you are right that many may never actually come true. At this point in my life though I am just happy for what I do have and thank god for it, whatever else comes about to me is a bonus and the cherry on top!!

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    1. Yay, I'm so happy to join in, Janine. I'm terrible about writing off prompts, so I'm glad I could finally figure it out!

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  2. "I don't like anyone to tell me what to do, even if it's me. It's a wonder I get anything done." YES. No wonder we are friends!

    I don't have a bucket list either. Not a formal one, anyway. If I did have one, it would probably include a lot of travel. But I think so much happens that you would never have imagined... how can you have a bucket list? It's why I don't have a 5-year plan anymore. F that. I always had to just scratch it out after 18 months anyway...

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  3. Rachel - I can never get the button code to work for me for FTSF, either! This is great, and so perfect for your blog.... Go with the flow, live with the Tao.... It's so funny, it's like the 'live in the moment, take it as it comes, live spontaneously' message of Taoism and the order and structure of Confucianism (hence my organized goals and list-making) are my yin and yang... So left-brain me wrote an organized, researched list, and Tao of Poop is just goin' with the flow.... Great post! :)

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    1. Glad the button thing wasn't personal. I was beginning to wonder if I should post my non-bucket list, or if it was a sign from the universe that I'd broken too many rules. I haven't read your post yet, Sarah, but you have me intrigued. I can't wait!

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  4. This is great! I love that quote about life being what happens while you are making other plans. I am a planner and I need to work on letting go and letting things just happen. (BTW - I can get the button from Kate's blog to work, but not the others!)

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    1. I find I have fewer meltdowns when I can just go with the flow more. It's better for everyone! Thanks for the tip about Kate's. I will try that next time!

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  5. Wow what an amazing experience that must have been!

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    1. I wasn't kidding when I said it blew me mind. It really did!

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  6. Awesome that you don't like anybody telling you what to do, including YOU. (me, neither!! oh and my husband hates it when I tell him what to do as well but he needs it. you and I do not.)

    Your Ecuador trip sounds AMAZING. Seriously amazing and love that they were duct taping a girl's dress at the last minute (my first wedding was in Mexico and we were forced to take it easy because they made us do so and it was perfect anyway...um, with the exception that I married somebody that I'd later divorce).

    Cheers to seeing where life takes you and Claire. I think that's the most perfect bucket list of all.

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    1. Damn straight, cookie! We do not need anyone telling us what to do!

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  7. Oh, Rachel, what a stunning FTSF debut! I really wish I could exemplify that mentality more often. I am SO Type A, it's painful. I loved the wedding story, and I felt like I didn't even need to see the photos of you laughing, I could totally picture it. That was wonderful.

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    1. Aw, thanks for the encouragement, Stephanie! I hope I will be back! It's fun.

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  8. I love this post! You are my intro to FTSF and I am so inspired. Love that you thought outside the box. Great writing. Looking forward to reading more!

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    1. Oh, good! I'm so glad. This was my first post for the hop!

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  9. Love, love, love your perspective. Can't wait for more. :)

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  10. Aha! Another person who doesn't plan! I now know of two, and I'm awestruck by the strength of character it takes to 'just roll with it'.

    Sounds like a fabulous attitude I could never hope to achieve (because, y'know, I'd have to add the obtaining of it to my list, which rather defeats the point). A great FTSF post :)

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    1. Well...I appreciate the words "strength of character". Honestly, sometimes, I feel more like I'm letting life happen to me. But then I remember John Lennon! :)

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    2. Good to have a source of inspiration.

      And FAR better to let life happen to you on YOUR terms, than have it happen to you when you're unprepared, the lists are no longer relevant and you're in freefall with no clue ;)

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  11. This is great! I'm with you, in that most of live did not go as planned but now I'm so GLAD it all went down as it did! You sound like you do a ton of great things, live a full life so you wouldn't NEED a bucket list. Great story, sounds like a really fun wedding and trip! Great post.

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    1. There are a ton of things that I would still like to do, but I really do feel pretty complete. Having my daughter has made me complete!

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  12. Love it Rachel...just letting life happen and enjoying the ride!! Finally, someone who'll ADMIT they're like me...hahaha! I think I make plans and write them down just to humor myself and those around me, lol! Thanks for making me feel like I'm not from another planet, lol! Thanks for stopping by and linking up...have an adventurous weekend! ;-)

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    1. Oh, Michell! I love hearing that you are similar! You seem to have it all together.

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  13. I don't do bucket lists. I can barely plan what I'm having for dinner, writing a list of long term goals is way too much responsibility.

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    1. Oh, can I relate, Kellie. Sometimes, the fact that I have a child scares me. The weird part is that I can also be really anal and a perfectionist too. I have a complicated mix of characteristics.

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  14. That is the best (non)bucket list ever! :)

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  15. The only thing I have planned in life is to keep breathing, and when that doesn't work, guess the bucket part will be done too. ; ) Another excellent post. BB2U

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  16. This is a great list! I'm kind of envious of you because I'm a total list maker. If I don't have a list to guide me then I'll sit and do whatever is easiest, in front of me, which is usually Spider Solitaire or Twitter. I have to remind myself to call my parents, friends, etc. Maybe if access to social media weren't so easy then I would remember to do some of these others things without a list.

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    1. Oh, I am so like that too with social media and forgetting to engage IRL, Kate! We have something in common, even though you are a list maker and I'm not!

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  17. I have a before I die list, I'm a bit of a list freak. Great post x

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    1. It takes all kinds to make the world go round, Gina! Cross a few off your list for me!

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  18. Great perception, Rachel. I so love your 3 lists and wish you well, my friend!

    I am glad i found you in this blogging world...hugs!

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    1. I LOVED reading your post, Ruchira! So glad to have found you too!

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  19. Oh my gosh, Rachel, I couldn't possibly love your list (or this post) any more than I already do! I saw that you were a first-timer to the FTSF link-up -- I am too! -- so I figured I'd give you a read, and I'm so glad I did. I can't wait to read more of your posts! (I'm now following you on g+ and Bloglovin).

    P.s. I also had trouble with the button, and I don't typically do very well writing off prompts either. But this one really spoke to me. :)

    -Brigid
    thepinkrollercoaster.com

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    1. Ah, a kindred spirit...someone else who can't write off of prompts. I'm sorry for your pain, but I"m glad I'm not alone!

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  20. I like your list. :) My DIL has visited Ecuador and loved it.

    I have a travel bucket list that is way too long to ever accomplish in my lifetime. No kidding. ;)

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    1. I think that's another reason I don't make lists. I don't want to disappoint myself! :)

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  21. I like this. I am 100% a list maker. In fact, I used to sometimes add things to my list that I already did, just so I could cross them off. But, I agree with you - sometimes the plans get in the way of the action. Your Equador trip sounded AMAZING - sometimes the only way you get to experience those amazing events is to just go for it and not overthink.

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    1. ha, ha! I would like for you to cross a few things off of your list for me, please!

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  22. You're right Rachel - that's eerie that you linked up a John Lennon post! I live by a couple of his quotes and the one you mentioned is a big one. I've not so much had a bucket list in life as a list of things I just planned on making happen someday. ha! I know. Like today, when my husband bought a mixing board for our home studio I told him that I always planned on having a home studio someday...and a husband who knew how to work all the equipment. He just laughed and said "Oh you did, did you?" I'm clearly nuts. But all of this is to say that sometimes it works out and sometimes as another favorite quote goes (from one of my favorite tv shows of all time "thirty something") "At some point you have to stop trying to live the life you planned and just live the one that unfolds for you" or something to that effect. I believe that's the best way to live - with goals but not too many expectations. That's how to be truly happy, I think. I loved this post.

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    1. I love what you wrote at the end "goals, but not too many expectations". Those are words to live by too. You and John Lennon. You're in pretty good company, woman!

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  23. Perfect bucket list. I can just picture you in Ecuador. And I can also see where Claire may have gotten her I don't like people telling me what to do look!

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  24. Thanks to the flaming laptop and the disappearing/reappearing internet connection, I'm just now getting around to reading some of the FTSF stuff.

    I have found that it does not matter how well you plan, that often life does not cooperate anyway. Is that a song? That John Lennon song is very fitting.

    You saw my bucket list. First I need to buy a bucket.

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    1. I have neither a bucket or a list! Ha! I wish I had thought of that for this post! We need to work together some time, Sarah!

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  25. You sound like a real fly by the seat of your pants kind of gal! I am impressed :)

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  26. You sound like a real fly by the seat of your pants kind of gal! I am impressed :)

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  27. I am amazed at how beautifully you tell a story even in response to a prompt. And so well with the right amount of words. I aspire to write like you my dear.

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  28. Well done. How much do we miss by failing to see what's around us? I'm just wanting to see you in a dress two sizes to small laughing uncontrollably. The seams had to be ready to burst at any second. Love your list!

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  30. What an awesome post! I am a minimal planner...we just took a family vacation and while I planned out the lodging...each day we kind of took things as they came. Which made it a wonderful vacation! Thank you for stopping by and joining This Momma's Meandering Mondays! Have an awesome week!

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