The Good, The Bad and The Toddler

My baby girl turns TWO! Really, not my baby anymore. She's a person!

I couldn't be more honored to be the mama she chose to witness her transformation from baby to
toddler.

However, the miraculous milestones of toddlerhood give this mama equal opportunity to celebrate, and to complain. Half the time I'm down with the peace sign for two, the other half flipping the bird!

Here's what I mean about toddler schizophrenia:

My toddler has her own personality!
She insists on wearing a hat in eight degree weather, decides she only wants cake for breakfast or refuses to get into a car seat without a huge commotion.

She puts on her clothes all by herself!
After an hour's worth of effort.

She can undress herself too!
In public.

She understands cause and effect!
She opens the refrigerator to dump out the contents of an entire can of coffee or bag of walnuts.

She has a mouth full of baby teeth!
Which she uses to bite the cat, her parents and friends in baby classes.

She climbs up onto her chair to eat all by herself!
She climbs onto tables, bookcases and over various barriers meant to contain her.

She can talk!
Whine, say "no" and imitate my curse words with great precision and impeccable inflection.

She can walk!
Into a crowd or oncoming traffic.

She's gotten so big!
She can reach up onto kitchen counters and other surfaces that contain dangerous objects like knives and pens.

She's even tall enough to reach up and hold my hand when we're walking together!
She refuses to hold my hand when we're walking together.

She can run too!
Away from me after placing beads, pebbles and other random debris in her mouth that she's found on the ground and that are dirty and/or may result in choking.

She eats with a fork!
The fork makes a perfect catapult to propel food away from the table.

She's old enough for potty training!
Oh, yeah, we need to start potty training.

She throws a ball!
Or rocks, blocks and other heavy yet aerodynamic objects capable of breaking windows and/or causing bodily harm.

She likes to draw!
On walls, furniture, expensive family heirlooms and the entire length of her body.

Happy Birthday, sweet girl! I marvel at my growing, learning, curious beauty, who embraces the world with arms wide open!
When she's not making me want to pull my hair out.


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Photo Source: Mike Bailey-Gates, Flickr, this photo was resized, which does not suggest that the licensor endorses me, this site or its content.
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Growing Up

On New Year's Eve last year, Claire had yet to say her first word or take a step. She hadn't felt ice-cream melt sweetly in her mouth, nor had she crunched a slice of shiny red apple. She hadn't returned a hug or a kiss. She'd yet to make a joke that had us laughing together. 

She enters 2013 able to do all of these things and more. The new year holds such possibilities for her as well.

Just as 2013 contains potential for all of us. I wish everyone a year of growth like a child. I wish you the capacity to embrace change in 2013, to make new discoveries, and to lust for life in the way of a child -- curious, courageous and eyes wide open.

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Learning to Walk and Other Life Lessons

I barely remember a time when Claire didn’t walk. It’s been a mere two months, but the transformation could not be more enduring.  Sure, children start out with the struggle of the learning curve, but once they reach a milestone, they never look back. 

While Claire was learning to walk, I was learning about life. It was my first lesson in letting go. I wanted to help. I could hold her hand and cheer her on, but I couldn’t stop her from falling. I couldn’t show her how to find her equilibrium. I couldn’t take a step for her.

She had to discover how to stand on her own two feet and move through the world. Literally and metaphorically, isn’t this experience what we want most for our children? Why is it so hard to do?

Claire took it all in stride. She would find a tentative center and lurch forward. Her feet didn’t yet know how to keep up with her head and upper half of her body. She would stumble back down to the floor. Over and over again.

I was impatient.

Yet, falling was time well spent for Claire. She developed elegant ways to catch herself on the way down, crashing on her belly and looking up at me with a giggle. “How smart!” I thought. “She needs to know how to fall right, before she can walk.”

I started to feel in awe of her grace. I started to feel joy being in her presence and watching. I began to wonder about my own need to be right and to have things just so.

When do we begin to see our efforts as failure when what we really need is more practice? When do we replace the ability to make fools of ourselves with feelings of shame and embarrassment? When do we stop having fun in the moment and worry only about the end result?

Claire has no self-doubt. She shows complete faith in the process. She isn’t concerned about when the goal will be achieved.

The best self-help gurus preach about this stuff all the time.  They’ve got nothing on my daughter Claire.